It's All in The Genes

In my last post, if you'll remember, I had been to see a Genetic Counselor (GC) and they took a vial of blood to send to a lab for genetic testing. Well, last Friday (November 13), I received a call from the GC and she advised that my results had come back and I had no mutations on any of the 47 genes they tested. 

I'm not a mutant. 

I'm normal. 

Really??? 

So, where did the cancer come from??? Why me??? I don't know where the cancer came from. I don't know why I got cancer. But I do know that I thank God for cancer and that He will get all the glory and honor and praise through it all. 

This song from Jonathan Traylor "You Get The Glory" says it all:

One of my sayings when something "bad" happens in my life is "for my good & His glory." Can you say that with all that's swirling around us each day? My prayer is that I will always have that attitude. - "For my good & His glory."

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!! May your blessings be many even though fewer people may be at your table!!!

Prayer Requests:

December 22, 7am - Blood draw. Please pray that my CA-125 number has remained where it was at the end of October (or lower) and that my other numbers have improved to where they should be.

December 29, 9am - Doctor appointment. Please pray for wisdom as post-chemo maintenance treatments are discussed.

Only by His Strength,

Sandy

Family Ties

During the week of October 19, I had a flu shot, a pneumonia shot, a CT scan and a mammogram and my blood drawn. The two tests I was most concerned about were the CT scan and the lab results. I needed the answers so I would know if I would be have another round of chemo. After many, many prayers by many of you reading this blog, I received the results of the CT scan on Wednesday afternoon. Praise the Lord!!! ... It was clear and looked good!!!! Now I had to wait until Friday to get the results from Thursday's blood draw. On Friday afternoon, I received the call ..... my CA125 went back down to 27.7!!! Praise the Lord!!! Then to complete the cycle, my oncologist's nurse called on Monday to confirm ..... no more chemo!!! Praise the Lord!!!!!!!!!!

On Tuesday, October 27, I had my follow-up appointment. After the physical exam, my doctor sat down and talked about genetic testing. He wants me to do genetic testing to see if I have certain markers/mutations related to cancer. Once he gets the results, that will guide him with my post-chemo treatment options. But the best news at my visit was when he said .... "See you in 2 months!!!" WooHoo!!!! 2 months!!!! I was expecting 6 weeks, but 2 months is AWESOME!!!!!! The only downer of the day was that because my magnesium count was so low, I had to go up to the infusion floor and sit for 2 hours while they hooked me up and had a magnesium drip. 

So... yesterday (November 3) I had my initial visit with a genetic counselor (GC). After asking many questions about my personal health history, she then asked about my family's medical history - back as far as my grandparents. She was especially looking for cancer trends. I have a very small family. The only person in my family that passed from cancer was my aunt. After explaining testing and gene panels, etc., I decided to have the full testing. I kept thinking, knowledge is power and I want to know if there is something in my body's make-up that make me more susceptible to other cancers or diseases. Once I finished talking to the GC, they came and took about 1/2 a vial of blood to send to the lab that does the genetic testing. I should hear back from the GC in about 3-4 weeks to discuss the results. 

With all this talk of family, I got to thinking, I'm part of a much bigger family .... the family of God. I became a part of this family when I asked Jesus to be my Savior and Lord when I was 9 years old. That makes me one of God's kids and if you're a believer, than you're my sister or brother!!! And just like in any family, there are some disagreements and misunderstandings. However, in the end, we should all agree that Jesus is Sovereign and His love never ends. The world should see our family as one who lives and shows the "fruit of the Spirit." Galatians 5:22-23 defines them as, "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law." Are you showing your "fruit" to the world??? And I heard once that you can't show any fruit at all unless you have the first one and that is LOVE!!! Do you truly show love? To your earthly family? To God's family? Even if they have a different color skin? Didn't vote the way you did? The only way the world will notice a difference is in how we LOVE!!! Remember the old campfire song, "They'll Know We are Christians" it's a simple truth .... it's by our LOVE!!! So go out and show some love today, tomorrow, and every day!!! 

I found this recording of the Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir singing "They'll know we are Christians by our Love." It's a different tune than you may be used to, but it's a powerful message to everyone. Sit back, close your eyes, and listen to the words, then go show some LOVE!!!

Prayer requests:

- Pray that whatever the results of the genetic testing, I will have wisdom to make good decisions regarding my health.

- Pray that my energy will return soon!!!

- Pray that my unemployment issues will be resolved quickly.

- Blood draw on Tuesday, December 22 - pray that my CA125 is still low and my platelets and magnesium numbers are up.

- Doctor follow-up on Tuesday, December 29 - pray for wisdom as post-chemo treatment options are discussed. 

And November 20 is my 7 year surgery anniversary when they found the cancer. What a journey it has been!!! I thank God for his love and leading every day!!! And I thank you for your many, many prayers and good thoughts on my behalf over the years. Love & hugs to you!!!

By His Strength,

Sandy

PS - Remember I entered a writing challenge at the end of July? Well, it was for Proverbs 31 Ministries and their First 5 app. I heard a few weeks ago that my entry was not chosen. I was a bit bummed at first, but I realized that I learned so much from doing the research on the passage that I would never have done had I not entered. I will continue to learn, continue to write, and continue to enter writing challenges. I will post what my entry was on the first Friday of January. That's when it would have been on the app if my entry had been chosen. If you haven't downloaded the app already, please look for First 5 where you find apps. It's a great way to start your day!!! And a new study begins on November 9.

Even Here ... Hallelujah

The past 10 days have been quite a whirlwind. Blood drawn, bags packed, chemo schedules altered, flight to a wedding celebration, breakfast with family in hotel room, quick drive through Clemson University, lunch with a long-time friend, back to the airport, church, doctor's appointments, test results, a Zoom book study, plus actually sitting in the chair and having chemicals pumped through your body in hopes of killing or slowing down the beast inside. No wonder I was so tired over the weekend and spent much of the time curled in a chair sleeping.

My hematology doctor appointment on Monday, October 5 went well and we'll evaluate my situation in a few months. At that point, she may cut my blood thinner dosage down. That was the good news of the week. After I got home from my early AM hematology appointment, I was able to access the results from my blood work. To say I was disappointed would be a huge understatement!!! How could my CA-125 go up??? Dear Lord ... what's going on??? Why God, why????

Then on Tuesday morning while waiting for my oncology appointment, I kept getting emails that I was scheduled for another round of chemo infusions. What??? This was number 3, this was it. Third times the charm ... right??? When I finally saw the doctor, he didn't even mention the higher CA-125 number and talked of getting another CT scan, etc. When I questioned about the added dates, he just said easier to cancel that to schedule if another was needed. Although that news was somewhat comforting .... I DON'T WANT TO DO ANOTHER ROUND OF CHEMO!!!!!!!! I am tired of chemo. I'm tired of cancer. I'm tired of being tired all the time. I'm tired of wearing a hat. I'm tired of not being able to have energy to do anything. 

The only thing I'm not tired of is God's unswerving faithfulness through this journey. 

Recently, a song has been playing on Christian radio - "Hallelujah, Even Here" sung by Linda Laird. It has quickly become a favorite. But, what does hallelujah mean? Most of us think of the timeless classical piece, "The Hallelujah Chorus" and that's our main reference to the word hallelujah. Alternatively, if something good happens to us, we may exclaim ... "Hallelujah!" This compound word has two parts. The first part - hallelu - means to praise joyously. The second part of the word - yah - is short for Yahweh, the God of the Israelites. In the ESV (English Standard Version) Bible, the word hallelujah is only found in Revelation 19 under the subtitle, "Rejoicing in Heaven." Hallelujah is the word that saints and those who've gone before us are saying around the throne of God Almighty. This word should not be uttered lightly!

With all that has happened over the past several days/weeks, I will still joyously praise God my Father for whatever happens in my life. I may not always like what's happening, but my life is in His hands. Hallelujah ... even here!!!

 

Prayer requests:

- Clear CT scan. Not scheduled as yet, currently waiting for pre-certification.

- Labwork - Thursday, October 22 - 8:30am ET - pray for lower CA-125 number and good platelet number.

- Oncology follow-up appointment - Tuesday, October 27 - 8:30am ET

- Chemo - round 10 - Tuesday & Wednesday, October 27 & 28 (if necessary) 

As always I am constantly amazed by your friendship, your constant prayers and your ongoing encouragement. I am so thankful for YOU!!!

Only by His Strength,

Sandy

Notorious vs. Righteous

Last week was a busy, but good week. On Sunday, September 13, our church's outdoor service finally included Children's Ministries and I volunteered to teach the large group Elementary lesson. We had about 35 kids in attendance and I really enjoyed teaching. In fact, I'm teaching on two Sundays in October. Hopefully, the weather will be nice and we can still be outside!!!

Pastor Justin & me before teaching KidBlast!

Because of doing the Carboplatin Desensitization in the hospital, I needed to get a COVID-19 test on the way home from church. Thankfully, it's the rapid test and they only "scrape" the back of your tongue. It's still gag-worthy, but better than the pipe cleaner up the nose!!! I had the results back on Monday and again, I was negative. 

On Tuesday, September 15, I had my oncologist appointment. Having already received the lab results via email and on my portal, I knew he would be pleased. My CA-125 was down to 26!!! I couldn't remember the last time that number was under 30. So, very good news at my appointment. 

On Wednesday morning, September 16, my sister dropped me at Cooper Hospital to check-in and start my long day. Admissions seemed to go quicker and soon I was given my pass to the MD Anderson floor at Cooper. This time, I was going to be in a different room. I was kind of bummed. I was beginning to think of Room 530 as my room. However, this time I was in Room 528. The CORNER room. It was HUGE!!! 

As I settled in and started moving the chair and plugging in my power cords, my nurse, Mary, came in and introduced herself. As we chatted, she asked a lot of questions. She even was tasked at asking about if I was depressed, etc. I told her absolutely not! I commented that if it wasn't for my faith in Christ and my incredible support network, I might be depressed. At that, she expressed her faith in Christ, too!!! We had some good chats. She and her family are currently attending a church in Philadelphia. I told her that she and her family were welcome at FAC. In fact, she was aware of one of our former pastors. 

Of course that day I forgot my earbuds, so, since the door was closed, I just played my Christian music throughout the room while I worked on my computer and took a nap. Mary commented how much she enjoyed the music!!! My oncologist and his posse even stopped by after his morning in surgery. We talked about whether I should get a flu & pneumonia shot. He said I should after chemo is over. I also asked about a shingles shot since I had pretty bad case of  chicken pox as a baby. He recommended not getting the shingles vaccination at this point in time. He then told an interesting story about how chicken pox is treated in Africa. ! We all were laughing by the time he left my room. I love my oncologist!!! I had my release papers and was home by 6pm. All in all, a very good day!

On Thursday, September 17, it was time for part 2 of my treatment -- Taxol. I drove myself to MDA and headed up to the infusion floor. I was called back and seated in the same seat that I first had a reaction to Taxol. After taking my vitals, I was informed that my nurse would be Becky. YEAH!!! Becky was one of my nurses back in 2014 when I had my first sets of chemo. It was great having a friendly face and someone who knew me. Of course, I remembered my earbuds, but forgot my chargers. UGH!!! However, due to all the pre-meds, I just took a nice nap, listened to music, and soon, my treatment was over and I was on my way home ... for another nap!!!

A few days ago, the US Supreme Court lost a legal giant, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, to complications of pancreatic cancer. She fought many battles both in the courtroom and in her personal life. If you weren't aware, she also become a pop icon with the moniker - Notorious RBG. Her image has been immortalized on shirts, mugs, and posters. However, I'm not sure I would want to be considered, "Notorious." In my book, notorious people have a bad rap. But the notorious that RBG was is defined as "publicly or generally known." She certainly will never be forgotten for her tireless work striving to pass laws that provided equality for all.

In fact, some are proclaiming her a tzaddeket. “A Jewish teaching says those who die just before the Jewish new year are the ones God has held back until the last moment because they were needed most & were the most righteous,” NPR legal affairs correspondent Nina Totenberg tweeted just after midnight. 

What does it mean to be righteous? Dictionary.com defines righteous as "characterized by uprightness or morality." With that definition, most of us would consider ourselves righteous. However, in diving in to see how God defines righteous and righteousness, I see a beautiful picture throughout Scripture of how God sees and teaches us about righteousness. 

The following statements (in italics) are from Baker's Evangelical Dictionary of Biblical Theology. And don't let the word theology make you stop reading. Theology basically means God knowledge. I don't know about you, but I need more God knowledge daily to combat what the world thinks is true.

God the Father is righteous (just); Jesus Christ his Son is the Righteous (Just) One; the Father through the Son and in the Spirit gives the gift of righteousness (justice) to repentant sinners for salvation; such believing sinners are declared righteous (just) by the Father through the Son, are made righteous (just) by the Holy Spirit working in them, and will be wholly righteous (just) in the age to come. They are and will be righteous because they are in a covenant relation with the living God, who is the God of all grace and mercy and who will bring to completion what he has begun in them by declaring them righteous for Christ's sake.

The appropriate background to bear in mind for understanding the teaching of both John the Baptist and Jesus the Christ on righteousness/justice are two of the dominant ideas of the Old Testament. First, Yahweh-Elohim, the Lord God, is righteous in that he speaks and Acts in accordance with the purity of his own holy nature; further, what he says and does for Israel is in accordance with his establishment of the covenant with this people (see Psalm 22:31; 40:10; 51:14; 71:15-24; Amos 5:21-24).

Second, the covenant people of God are called to live righteously, that is, in conformity to the demands of the covenant and according to God's will (see Psalm 1:4-6; 11:7; 72:1; Isa 1:16-17).

Thus God's people are righteous when they are in a right relation with him, when they enjoy his salvation; they are considered by God as the Judge of the world as righteous when they are being and doing what he requires in his covenant.

God's righteousness is, for Paul, God's saving activity in and through the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ, his Son. It is activity that is directly in line with the saving activity of God in the Old Testament. The acceptance of the unique saving deed of God at Calvary by faith in the person of Jesus Christ is that which God has ordained to be the means for sinners (the unrighteous and the disobedient ones) to enter into the right with God, the Father, and receive the forgiveness of sins. God as the Judge justifies believing sinners by declaring them righteous in and through Jesus Christ; then he expects and enables these sinners to become righteous in word and deed. Faith works by love.

It would be a mistake, however, to think that Paul does not use the word "righteousness" in its more familiar meaning as a virtue. In fact he does so particularly in 1 and 2 Timothy. He commends striving for righteousness (1 Tim 6:11) as the right motivation of a person of God; and he sees the use of the inspired Scriptures as being to train Christians in righteousness (2 Tim 3:16). Further, as a reward for his efforts for the kingdom of God he looks for "the crown of righteousness" (2 Tim 4:8).

Throughout the Bible (ESV), very few are considered righteous:

Genesis 6:9 - "Noah was a righteous man, blameless in his generation. Noah walked with God."

Genesis 15:6 - "And he (Abram) believed the Lord, and he counted it to him as righteousness.

2 Samuel 22:21 - “The Lord dealt with me (David) according to my righteousness..."

Job 1:1 - "There was a man in the land of Uz whose name was Job, and that man was blameless and upright (righteous), one who feared God and turned away from evil."

However, in Romans 3:9-25, it states: 

"What then? Are we Jews any better off? No, not at all. For we have already charged that all, both Jews and Greeks, are under sin, as it is written:

None is righteous, no, not one; no one understands; no one seeks for God.
All have turned aside; together they have become worthless; no one does good, not even one.
Their throat is an open grave; they use their tongues to deceive.
The venom of asps is under their lips.
Their mouth is full of curses and bitterness.
Their feet are swift to shed blood; in their paths are ruin and misery, and the way of peace they have not known.
There is no fear of God before their eyes.

Now we know that whatever the law says it speaks to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be stopped, and the whole world may be held accountable to God. For by works of the law no human being will be justified in his sight, since through the law comes knowledge of sin.

But now the righteousness of God has been manifested apart from the law, although the Law and the Prophets bear witness to it—the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all who believe. For there is no distinction: for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, whom God put forward as a propitiation by his blood, to be received by faith. This was to show God's righteousness, because in his divine forbearance he had passed over former sins."

So friends. How do we attempt to live righteous lives? We all are born sinners!!! It clearly states in Philippians 3:7-9: "But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith—"

I want to live righteous, not notorious!!! How about you?

Prayer Requests:

- Thursday, October 1, 7:45am - Labwork - Continue to pray for lower CA-125 number and a higher platelet number.

- Sunday, October 4 - COVID-19 test - Pray for negative result

- Monday, October 5, 8am - Follow-up appointment with hematology doctor

- Tuesday, October 6, 8:45am - Follow-up appointment with oncologist

- Wednesday, October 7 - Carbo Desensitization - The last one!!!

- Thursday, October 8, 10:30am - Taxol infusion - The last one!!!

- Friday, October 9, 2pm - Injection - The last one!!!

In Other News:

September is

In September 2013, I wouldn't have known or probably cared that it was Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month. I didn't know anyone with ovarian cancer. I didn't realize that 1 in 75 women will be diagnosed with ovarian cancer in their lifetime.

I am that ONE!!!

I live with that statistic daily. I pray that a cure will be found in my lifetime.

By this time in September, I have already walked in the Together in Teal Run/Walk. However, due to COVID-19, this year's walk was cancelled and moved to a virtual event this Saturday, September 26. BUT ... Team Believe from the Mt. Laurel area is walking at Laurel Acres on September 26 and is graciously allowing me to walk alongside them.

I would ❤️ for you be a part of my fundraising team for 2020 and please consider being part of my "in-person" team for the September 2021 Run/Walk!!! More details in early 2021. The link is below if you would like to support me. Any amount is gratefully appreciated and will be used for Ovarian Cancer research by the National Ovarian Cancer Coalition (NOCC).

I am really close to one of my intermediate goals. 

https://runwalk.ovarian.org/philadelphia/sandyperry

Only by His Strength,

Sandy

PS - Thank you for your prayers & encouragement. They mean the world to me!!!

Still Rock & Roll to Me!

As the old Bill Joel song says, "It's still rock & roll to me." That's what getting 3 more rounds of Mr. Chemo is ... it's still Carbo/Taxol to me!!! The words aren't as catchy as Billy Joel's but, work with me folks!!!

On Wednesday morning, my sister dropped me at the front door of Cooper Hospital and I said, "See ya later!" And based on the last time, I was thinking, much later! I signed in at the front desk, had my temperature taken, and went to the admissions desk. At least they found my name this time!!! Then I waited about 25 minutes until I was "officially" admitted and given my pass to the 5th floor of Roberts Pavilion - Room 530. This is the MD Anderson floor for all the cancer patients who need to be admitted to the hospital for surgery, procedures, and desensitization (me)!!! All the rooms on this floor are private. And when I get to my room, I'm pretty sure, this is the same room I was in after my emergency room visit. So, before my nurse comes in, I start to rearrange the furniture. My nurse, Bianca, comes in and starts turning down the bed. I told her in no certain terms, that I would NOT be getting in the bed!!!

Bianca, came back with all the stuff needed to access my port and all the pre-meds that are given before the actual Carbo desensitization begins. This was were the fun began. When she went to access my port, I didn't think it felt right when she put the needle in. And of course, she didn't get a good blood return and wasn't able to flush the port either. I requested that she take out this one and get a new kit and try again. Of course, when she took the first one out, some blood got on my tank top, bummer. 

She eventually came back with a new kit to access my port. I could tell she was a bit nervous to try again. I kindly told her there was no shame in asking for assistance. So, she called her supervisor and asked for her to come and help. Her supervisor, Heather, remembered me from the last time I was in for desensitization. Because my port is "tilted," she walked Bianca through and gave her some pointers. BAM!!! Bianca nailed it the second time!!! YEAH!!!!! Let the pre-meds begin.

I was hoping to order a cup of tea, but I had not been "approved" yet to order food. Bummer. Thankfully, Bianca took care of that quickly. Later I found out that I can get a cup of hot water right on the MDA floor. Yeah!!! I finally ordered my lunch and promptly took a nap. Bianca was great, but she kept "checking" on me.... like every 10 minutes. Everything went as it should and my oncologist even showed up to say "Hi!!!" I was done around 6:00 pm and my sister came and picked me up. 

The next day, was my Taxol infusion at 11 am. Again, ushered to the corner office. They hooked me up and I prompted took a nap for about an hour. The view wasn't anything I hadn't seen before, so I just read and relaxed and waited for my 3-4 hour infusion to be over. Once over, I drove myself back home and guess what .... I took another nap!!! Seems to be a theme here.

My next adventure was to see the Hematologist on Wednesday, September 2. After missing the exit and finding the right building/office, I met Dr. C. She introduced herself, gave me her card and her background. She asked a bunch of questions, we talked, we laughed and then she said the best thing..... I'm going to put you on blood thinner PILLS!!!! Oh hallelujah!!! My poor, bruised, and lumpy tummy is so grateful. Of course, my insurance company had to approve, but thankfully, they did and as of Saturday, September 5, I started on Eliquis. I'm sure most of you have seen the commercials on TV. Because blood clots are somewhat common in cancer patients, I will probably be on this drug for the rest of my life. 

God provides. He provided for the children of Israel as they wandered in the desert. He provided for Adam & Eve, Noah, David, and countless others throughout Scripture. Why wouldn't He provide for me??? Through surgery, treatments, blood tests, hospital stays, doctor appointments, and insurance/financial issues .... God has provided. God is providing. and God will provide!!!

I heard this song by Tamela Mann a few months ago. She sings the message of God's provision so fabulously. Please take a listen.

Are you trusting God for His provision???

Prayer Requests:

- Thursday, September 10 - blood draw 7:30am - Please pray all the numbers go in the directions they are supposed to go.

- Sunday, September 13 - COVID-19 test - Please pray it's negative.

- Tuesday, September 15 - Doctor/Oncologist appointment approx 8:45am- Please pray for wisdom and understanding if any decisions need to be made.

- Wednesday, September 16 - Carbo Desensitization (all day) - Please pray for no allergic reaction and an uneventful day.

- Thursday, September 17 - Taxol infusion (several hours) - Again, please pray for no allergic reaction and an uneventful day.

- Friday, September 18 - Neulasta similar injection (several minutes in the afternoon)

- Saturday, September 26 - Because of COVID-19, the NOCC Together in Teal Run/Walk in Philadelphia was cancelled. I found another group that is walking in NJ and they have graciously allowed me to walk alongside them to raise money for Ovarian Cancer research. I would love if you could spare a few dollars for this cause. All the money raised is for the National Ovarian Cancer Coalition (NOCC) and the research they are funding. The link is:

https://runwalk.ovarian.org/philadelphia/sandyperry

As always, thank you so much for your prayers, virtual hugs, and encouragement!!!

Only by His Strength,

Sandy

PS -- September is Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month - Teal is the color. 

The Birthday Present

 As many of you know, August 11 was not only my birthday, but my follow-up oncology appointment. I woke up a little late and then had to rush through breakfast and drive MDA. Since I didn't see any red flags on my CT scan report, I was expecting to discuss maintenance drugs, etc. with my doctor and he would say ... "See ya in 4-6 weeks."  Well, that was not what he was thinking. I guess he saw that I still had the small pleural effusion from February and my CA125 number had risen and he didn't like that combo. 

So ... he said, "I want you to do 3 more rounds of chemo." The first 2 will be the desensitization protocol and hopefully the 3rd one will be a "normal" one. Of course, I was shocked, saddened, and speechless!!! UGH!!! More chemo!!! With that news, he wished me a happy birthday and left the room. The nurse stayed and discussed some details. She, too, seemed a bit shocked that 3 more rounds were prescribed. He wanted me to start next week, but I have a life to live and my sister and I are going on the Philly Modern Quilt Guild's Summer Retreat!!! I've been waiting for this weekend since it was rudely cancelled in March by COVID-19. Therefore, I will have my first, fun week of chemo on August 26-28. 

We all love presents. When we were kids, we hoped our present might be a bike or a favorite doll. Today, kids want electronics and gaming devices or something outrageous that their parents can barely afford. When I was a child, my family loaded up the station wagon and headed west to one of our country's amazing National Parks. This was usually for two weeks in August. One of my favorite memories was touching snow in Glacier NP on my birthday. That being said, I was never home on my birthday and never had a birthday party and never got presents on my birthday. Don't be sad. Looking back as an adult, I realize that I did receive a gift ... precious memories with my family which will never break or wear out!!!

Friends, every day we receive the same 24 hours. What we do with them is up to you??? Will you use your time to make memories with your family? Will you mend a broken relationship? Will you serve the Lord? Will you speak out against racial injustice? Will you show love to your neighbor? I can't think of a better present to give to God, than using my time and talent for His Glory. Is going through 3 more rounds a great birthday present??? No!!! But if that is what God wants me to do, than all I can do is say, "Thank you," open the gift and see where He leads. I trust Him!!!

A new take on "Trust in You" by Lauren Daigle.

Prayer Requests:

- All the details for these next 3 rounds of chemo would work out

- That I would hear from the Hematology Department to set up an appointment regarding the little blood clots.

- That the pill I'm taking for the neuropathy in my fingers would work quickly

Only by His Strength,

Sandy

 

Just a little bump in the road

It all started on Thursday, August 6 with a phone call from a nurse at Cooper at approximately 2pm ET. Then I posted this on my Facebook page at 3:13pm ET:

I then posted the following to Facebook on Friday, August 7 at 8:51am ET:

Good Morning from the MD Anderson floor at Cooper. When I woke up yesterday morning, I did not expect to end the day in a ER23 waiting for a room. After I got home from my CT scan, I received a call from a triage nurse advising that they noticed some very small blood clots in my lungs and requested that I go to the ER for evaluation, etc. So, I gathered a few items and my sister drove me to the ER. After checking in and waiting for over 2 hours to be “seen,” I finally was ushered to a stretcher in the hall next to a woman who was trying to throw up. UGH!!! I expressed my feelings to the attending doc and I soon was rolled into ER23. After checking my vitals and them drawing more blood, I relaxed and watched the Phillies game. And they WON!!! Finally, they came with an injection of blood thinner and a pill for the neuropathy. I tried to catch some , but the ER was a little noisy.

THEN... at midnight, the nurse came in and said, “I didn’t realize that a COVID-19 test wasn’t done.” So.... I had to endure the up the nose test — TWICE!!! One was for the rapid test and one was the regular test. Friends, please wear a mask and practice social distancing!!! The test is very uncomfortable. I wouldn’t wish it on any of you!!!

After that, I was able to get a few, uninterrupted hours of sleep.

Around 4:45 AM, they moved me to a regular room. After getting settled, I was able to snooze for a bit, but was awakened by a doctor. She listened to my heart, etc. and talked about going home and doing the blood thinner injections myself!!! YIKES!!! Currently, we are waiting to see if my insurance will cover this drug.

If all goes well, I will hopefully be released later today!!!!!!!! WooHoo!!!!!

Friday, August 7

At 6:30am, I was "rudely" awakened by a doctor checking on me. Of course, I had only fallen asleep about 15 minutes earlier. She checked my heart, etc. and left. Then I quickly dialed the number for FOOD!!! I ordered a bigger than normal breakfast because I hadn't eaten since about 2:30pm on Thursday and waited for them to deliver it. I was sooooooooo hungry!!!

I was so happy. I found out that my day nurse would be Nora. The same nurse I had for my Carbo desensitization!!! She came in shortly after 7am with a smile and happy greeting like we were old friends. Breakfast arrived and I made short work of the cheese omelet, bacon, bagel, orange juice, and hot tea. The rest of Friday, I was seen by several different medical personnel. Some were there to check whether I could walk, squeeze their hands, tie my shoes, get up from the bed, etc. I was like ... really??? All I really wanted to do was put a do not disturb sign on the door and sleep, but no!!! Then they came and checked my blood pressure, oxygen level, and temperature. Geez!!! Finally, I learned that my insurance would cover the blood thinner injections. I successfully learned how to inject myself and found that I really can stick myself with a needle. Finally, about 3pm, I was able to catch some sleep, but Nora came in about 4:15pm ET with my release papers and instructions. I quickly texted my sister and said, "Please come and get me!!!" I packed up the few items I had been using, said good-bye to Nora & the tech, Takiyah, and happily walked to the elevator and went down to the lobby level. I picked up and paid for the prescription for the injections and walked out to my sister's car. FREEDOM!!! We then drove to CVS to pick-up another prescription for my neuropathy. We finally made it home where I could finally take a little, uninterrupted nap before dinner from Shake Shack.

I wrote the following Facebook post on Friday evening:

PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!! I’M HOME!!!!!!! I’m tired, but I’m home!!!!!! I’ll update tomorrow morning after hopefully a good night of sleep.

Thanks again for ALL your prayers!!! Love & hugs!!!!!!!

I spent the rest of the weekend either sleeping or working on our business inventory with my sister.

Now, tomorrow, August 11, I have my follow-up appointment with my oncologist. I'm sure we'll have a lot to discuss including what's next in my cancer journey. I sure would appreciate your prayers!!!

As always, thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

Only by His Strength,

Sandy

The Long Good-bye to Mr. Chemo

Before I begin, I just need to thank the many of you who prayed for me through this toxic relationship with Mr. Chemo. I could not have done it without you!!! Consider yourself loved and hugged!!!

The week of July 12, like this year, seemed to go on and on and on. My first task of that week was to get a COVID-19 test on Sunday after church. Of course, because nothing is ever easy, when starting my car at church, my key fob cracked open leaving the plastic part with the buttons in my hand and the metal key in the ignition. At least the car started and I could drive it to the testing site and home!!!

Once at the testing site, all I needed to do was roll down my window and stick out my tongue. The person just swabbed my tongue and I was on my way. I was so thankful that they didn't do the pipe cleaner up your nose one. I was really dreading that. By Monday afternoon, I had an email stating that my results were negative. Hallelujah!!! I still walked around the house stating, "I'm such a negative person!!!" LOL!!!! Monday was spent doing all the things around the house that I wouldn't be able to do until the following week.

Tuesday morning was my follow-up appointment with my oncologist's Advance Practice Nurse. The visit went well even though my CA-125 number went up 1 point to 31. However, my platelets went crazy and were over 200!!! WOW!!!!! Thank you Jesus!!!!! The only order of business that was discussed was that I need to have another CT scan before my next appointment. Scheduling my next appointment for 3-4 weeks was a little complicated, but by the end of the week my next appointment was scheduled for August 11.

Bright and early Wednesday morning, my sister dropped me at the entrance to Cooper University Hospital on her way to work. After waiting in the admissions office for what seemed like hours, I was given my hospital bracelet and my elevator pass to get me to the 5th floor for my Carboplatin desensitization procedure. Once I found my room, I settled in and waited for my nurse. Before the nurse arrived, one of my oncologist's interns stopped by to see how I was doing. Nora soon introduced herself and she began prepping all the stuff to access my port, etc. Of course, I had to move the furniture around so I could plug in my laptop. Nora had to be re-certified to access a port, so she called the Nurse Educator in and to my surprise and delight it was Mary Jane!!! Mary Jane was one of my nurses the first time I went through chemo in 2014 and she remembered me. Nora passed accessing my port and began the pre-chemo drugs dripping through my body. The desensitization is a series of 4 bags with an increasing Carboplatin concentration as you go. Nora hung the first bag and because of all the Benadryl and steroids and fluids and the fact that I hadn't slept well the night before, I decided a nap was in order. But first, I ordered my lunch (very important)!!!

My lunch came. I ate it and then got my laptop out to work on some business stuff. Nora switched to the second bag. I was working away when I glanced at my hands and my arms. "NORA!!!!!" I cried out. She came running. Sure enough... I was having another allergic reaction to the Carbo. She stopped the stuff from dripping into me. My arms and legs were breaking out into hives and red splotches and my palms were all dry and ready to start itching. After consulting with the on-call doctor, it was decided that they would give me more Benadryl and more steroids and then start the drip again, but this time really, really slow. I thought ... great .... I'll be here until midnight!!!! After about 45 minutes or so, the hives and  red splotches disappeared and the dry palms were cured with some hand lotion. Nora finally started the Carbo again and over the next couple of hours slowly increased the drip. Of course, with more Benadryl and steroids racing through my body ... I took another nap!!!

When I woke up, it was time to order dinner and watch the 6 o'clock news. By this time, I was halfway through bag #4!!! Yeah!!! It wouldn't be a midnight release!!! After a pizza dinner, I finished working on some of my computer stuff, called my sister to come and get me, and waited for the last bag to finish. Nora came and unhooked me and gave me my release papers. I thanked her for all her hard work, walked to the elevator, and waited outside for my sister to arrive. 

On Thursday, I was to report to the MD Anderson building to finish my round of chemo. I drove myself since it's only about 2 1/2 miles. I checked in and waited to be called back for my final treatment!!! After only a few minutes, I was called back and after checking my blood pressure, etc., my nurse for the day came and introduced herself. She got me hooked up and gave me more Benadryl and steroids. Here we go again!!! Nap time!!!!!!! The drip for the Taxol took about 3-4 hours. It was a pretty boring day and the view (below) was not great. Once I was done, I drove myself home and guess what ... I took another nap. Do you notice a theme???

My fabulous view from my chair - July 16, 2020

The only thing left to do was on Friday afternoon, my sister drove me back to MDA for my final injection. It was a long, crazy, tiring week. But, thank the Lord, my relationship with Mr. Chemo is over!!! Breaking up was not hard to do!!! Now it's on to getting my strength and stamina back. 

When thinking about writing this blog post, other than telling you about my long good-bye to Mr. Chemo, I hit a brick wall. I prayed and I prayed. I read Scripture and prayed some more. Part of the difficulty may have been the fact that I was writing a Bible study/devotional to enter in a challenge by Proverbs 31 Ministries. My mind was totally absorbed in study and writing and entering by July 24. I won't know if my writing was selected until sometime in October. Then one morning as I was waking up, I definitely "heard" the word waterfall in my mind. What Lord???

all photos were taken by me - August 2011

I started looking for waterfalls in the Bible. The only reference I could find is Psalm 42:7. I did some study on that verse, prayed, and nothing really clicked. I then looked up Christian songs with waterfalls. I only found two with waterfall in the title. Why was God making this post so hard to write??? Then I realized that throughout the Bible, God uses water to symbolize life and new life in Him, as in baptism. Water is the first element mentioned in Genesis. Noah had to deal with the flood waters. The only way to get water in Bible times was from a well. Water was and continues to be used for cooking, cleaning, and bathing. Jesus walked on water, washed the disciples feet, was baptized in the Jordan River, and turned the water into wine. 

As I stood at the top of my personal waterfall on March 31, the bottom looked far away and uncertain. But with God by my side, I took that leap of faith and headed towards the pool at the bottom. Yes, there were some rocks along the way, but God never said this life would be easy. He just said, "Follow me." So, I have reached the wonderful and refreshing pool at the bottom. I want to stay and just float on my back and soak in the cool water and never leave. But God is reminding me that He has other tasks for me to do. He reminds me not to be complacent. 

Keep striving. 

Keep running the race that He has set before me. 

Keep learning His ways. 

Keep leaning on Him!!!

Here is one of the songs. "Waterfall" featuring Maranda Curtis by David & Nicole Binion.

Prayer Requests:

• August 6 - Bloodwork 7am ET - pray for lower CA125
• August 6 - CT scan 9:30am ET - pray for nothing new and previous issues to be gone.
• August 11 - Follow-up visit with oncologist 8:45am ET - pray for wisdom as maintenance drugs will be discussed (it's also my birthday!!!)
• Pray for the neuropathy from chemo in the tips of my thumbs & pointer fingers and bottom of both feet to lessen. It just feels really weird. I'm also having some pain in my right thumb joint. 
• Pray for my strength and stamina to return. 
• Pray for the government to start traveling so I can return to work.

Only by His Strength,

Sandy

In the Wait .... No More or In the Wait .... Part 2

Wouldn't you know that the day after I posted my last update, my doctor's office called and gave me the news. Because I had an allergic reaction to the Carboplatin during date #5, I will need to go through a desensitization procedure for the next and last date with Mr. Chemo. I thought ... I won't be sensitive anymore. Sniff! Sniff!!!!! LOL!!!!

What this procedure entails is spending 12 hours, as an outpatient, in the hospital so they can slowly drip the Carboplatin into my body. Although I'm not really looking forward to sitting in one place for 12 hours, I'm ready for this whole dating thing to be over!!! Therefore, what usually takes 1 long day will be stretched over 2+ days.

Next week's never-ending date looks like this:

Sunday, July 12 - COVID-19 test. Because I will be in the hospital for the procedure, I need to be tested 2 days prior. 

• Please pray for negative results!!!

Tuesday, July 14 - Regular follow-up appointment.

• Please pray for good results from blood work on Thursday, July 9, etc.

Wednesday, July 15 - Carboplatin Desensitization @ Cooper Hospital

• Please pray that I would tolerate the drug well and the procedure would be smooth

Thursday, July 16 - Finish my Date #6 with Mr. Chemo and ring the bell!!!

• Please pray that all would go well with this infusion. I have had a reaction to this drug in the past.

Friday, July 17 - Last injection to boost my white blood cells.

• Please pray I will never need to date Mr. Chemo again!!!

My pastor's wife turned me on to this song from Bethel Music called "Take Courage." Sung by Kristene DiMarco. 

Only by His Strength,
Sandy

In The Wait

Tuesday, June 23 began as any other chemo date. I woke up, showered, had breakfast, packed my lunch, got dressed, and packed my "things to do" bag. I was happy because this was Date #5 of 6. My sister dropped me off at MD Anderson and waited until they checked my temperature, etc. I had my doctor appointment first and of course, I knew my CA125 had gone down 4 points to 30!!! PTL!!! My platelets had dipped a little, too, but not too the "no chemo today point." The doctor seemed happy with my progress and dismissed me to the 3rd floor to start my date with Mr. Chemo.

I was escorted back to my designated seat. This time, I had the corner office!!! Not great views, but acceptable. 

Everything went well with all the pre-meds. Then they hooked me up for the slow Taxol drip. No problems. I relaxed and took a nap thanks to the Benadryl in the pre-meds. After snoozing for about an hour or so, I was feeling hungry, so, I thought .... lunchtime!!! Unfortunately, the little table that attaches to the chair is not very well conceived or constructed. In my humble opinion, it is too small, on the wrong side, and not level with the arms of the chair. And the worst part is ... it slants!!! Knowing this, my nurse had shoved a small, flat tissue box under the back part so things wouldn't slip off. Unfortunately, over the course of a few hours, the tissue box flattened and my water bottle crashed to the ground, the lid broke off and water spilled all over the floor!!! What a mess!!! Thankfully, the nurses brought over some blankets and dried up all the water. Such excitement before noon!!!

After lunch, my Taxol drip was complete and they started the next round of pre-meds so they could start the slow drip for the Carboplatin. At this point I fought off taking another snooze and opened up my laptop and started working on some business stuff. At some point, my palms started to itch. My thoughts ... "the air in here must be really dry." "I need to get some hand lotion from my handbag." "Geez, now the tops of my hands are itchy." "If I don't stop scratching, I'm going to make myself bleed!!!" At that point, my nurse comes over to bump up my Carbo drip. I show her my hands and now my face is flushed and I have blotches up and down my arms!!! YIKES!!! She immediately stops the Carbo drip and I am immediately surrounded by 6-7 nurses and one nurses hooks me up to the oxygen tank. Here I am not looking too happy being on oxygen!!! 

The nurse contacted my oncologist and he advised not to finish my Carbo drip for the day. So, they gave me some more IV fluids until my red face and blotchiness disappeared. Then, I called my sister for my ride home. The nurse assured me that the doctor would contact me and advise next steps. Well ... as of writing this, it's been a week and I have not heard a peep from my doctor or any of his associates. At first it was very frustrating, then I was kind of mad. Now, I'm just figuring, if he's not concerned, than neither am I. So, now that 99% of my side effects are gone, I'll move on with my life and my things to do list. 

Waiting area at MD Anderson, Camden, NJ

But still I'm waiting. Waiting for a call. Waiting for an answer. Waiting for a cure!!! Throughout the Bible, God's people, prophets, disciples and apostles all waited. They waited to be delivered, they waited for a blessing, they waited for a King!!!

For the past several months, most of us have waited or sheltered at home. Our "normal" activities and movements became non existent. We waited for church buildings to open, stores to open, for restaurants to open, and most importantly, we waited for the beauty parlor/nail salon to open up!!! Not me, though, I still have no hair!!! LOL!!! 

In this time of pandemic, what are you doing in the wait? Are you mumbling and complaining or are you learning and growing in the Lord? Here are several verses from Psalms about waiting:

Psalm 25:5 "Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long."

Psalm 25:21 "May integrity and uprightness preserve me, for I wait for you."

Psalm 27:14 "Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!"

Psalm 31:24 "Be strong, and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for the Lord!"

Psalm 33:20 "Our soul waits for the Lord; he is our help and our shield."

Psalm 37:7 "Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices!"

Psalm 37:34 "Wait for the Lord and keep his way, and he will exalt you to inherit the land; you will look on when the wicked are cut off."

Psalm 39:7 "“And now, O Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in you."

Psalm 40:1 "I waited patiently for the Lord; he inclined to me and heard my cry."

Psalm 130:5 "I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I hope;"

But there is one thing I'm really waiting for ....... My Lord's return to gather his followers and take them to heaven. I don't know when that's going to happen, I just know I ready for it to happen!!! Are you???

In the meantime, here is a great song written by Chris Tomlin, Jesse Reeves & Martin Smith titled "Waiting Here for You." Performed by Christy Nockels.

Until He returns or calls me home, that's what I'll be doing ... waiting here for You!!!

Prayer Requests:

Blood work at 7am ET on Thursday, July 9

• Pray for lower CA-125 number
• Pray for increased platelets
• Pray for easy blood draw

Last date with Mr. Chemo on Tuesday, July 14 - YEAH!!!

• Pray for good appointment with oncology APN
• Pray for wisdom - hopefully, life after chemo will be discussed
• Pray for no allergic reaction to either of my chemo drugs

Please pray for me. I signed up to participate in a Christian devotional writing "contest." My entry is due on July 24. Pray for divine guidance, His words, and that He would grow me through the process.

Bracelets from my "niece"

Only by His Strength,
Sandy