Into the Unknown

If you've watched any Disney movies in the past couple of years, you'll remember the popular sequel to Frozen ... Frozen 2. In the movie, Queen Elsa and her sister Anna are ruling over Arendelle when Elsa starts hearing a voice calling to her. She sings the iconic "Into the Unknown" song, reawakens the "spirits," and then Elsa, Anna, Kristoff, Sven, and Olaf set off to find the "unknown" voice and why it is calling to her. After finding the enchanted forest and learning new information about the death of her parents, Elsa takes off alone to follow the unknown voice. You'll have to watch the movie to find out the rest of the story. 

Fortunately, there isn't much "unknown" when you're on your sixth date with Mr. Chemo. After my follow-up appointment on Tuesday, where they ordered another CT scan and advised my numbers were going in the right direction, I asked a few questions. Of course, without definite details, the answers were somewhat hypothetical. Because my CA-125 only dropped from 76 to 67, I asked what if my CA-125 didn't get back to a "normal" level of 35? I was advised that it would probably depend more on what the CT scan showed than the actual CA-125 number. Armed with that information, I head up to the infusion floor for what was to be a long day hooked up to Mr. Chemo. After my usual napping and eating lunch, I worked on some business stuff for a while. Towards the end of my infusion, there was some commotion on the other side of the partition from where I was seated. The girl in the chair was crying out in agony. I don't know what was happening to her body with the treatment, but I could tell she was writhing in pain and that she was scared. There were several nurses with her trying to calm her down so they could remove her IV. They were also trying to reach her doctor so they could prescribe something to reduce the pain. At that point, I just stopped whatever I was doing and bowed my head and prayed. After what seemed like a long time, the doctor actually arrived, called in some meds, and helped calm everything down. By the time I was unhooked and ready to leave, the girl was much calmer, and I thanked the Lord for answering my prayers.

On Wednesday, I had the same nurse as the girl from the night before. Without giving personal information, she let me know that the girl was much improved by the time she left on Tuesday night. Because I arrived early on Wednesday, I was taken earlier which was great because my nurse advised that they were going to slow down my infusion because I always seemed to have a reaction. So, after all the pre-meds, etc., I took a nap, ate my lunch, and watched a movie. Soon it was time to say good-bye to Mr. Chemo, but since my regular ride could not be there for a couple of hours, I texted my fabulous neighbor to see if she could come and get me. Thankfully, she was available and soon I was on my way home!!! Thank you SC!!!

So, as I write this post, I am waiting on the unknown. The dictionary defines unknown as not within the range of one's knowledge, experience, or understanding; strange; unfamiliar. I don't know what the CT scan will reveal. I don't know what my blood work numbers will be. I don't know what the doctor will say. I don't know how that will impact my life in the short term. 

What I do know is the following:

Noah didn't know how to build an ark, but God knew.

Moses didn't know how to lead the Israelites out of Egypt, but God knew.

Esther didn't know that requesting an audience with the king would save her people, but God knew.

Joseph didn't know that being sold into slavery would someday save his family, but God knew.

Daniel didn't know that eating his veggies would save him from lions, but God knew.

David didn't know that being a shepherd would one day make him a king, but God knew.

Mary didn't know that her firstborn son would save the world, but God knew.

The disciples didn't know that following Jesus would lead to new life, but God knew.

Zacchaeus didn't know his life would change when he climbed a tree, but God knew.

Saul didn't know that encountering a light on a road would change his name and lead him to the life of an itinerant preacher, but God knew.

We all have unknowns in our lives - relationships, employment, health, financial, and the list goes on. It's how we deal with the unknowns that make all the difference. Do you withdraw into fear and anger or do you dig deep and trust in God? I love this quote by Corrie ten Boom, "Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God." It goes hand in hand with the quote, "I don't know what the future holds, but I know who holds the future."

As the days pass, I sometimes find myself worried/anxious about the future, but then I remember .... God knows.

This is a popular song on Christian radio. It's by a sibling group called CAIN. And yes, that's their last name. It's a fun video with bright colors and deep meaning. Enjoy!!!

Prayer Requests:

** Wednesday, March 30 - 9:30am ET - CT scan

    - Please pray for a very clear scan. The results of this test may determine if I am done with chemo or I need more rounds.

** Tuesday, April 5 - 7:30am ET - Blood draw

    - Please pray for a lower CA-125

** Thursday, April 7 - 9:45am ET - Doctor appointment

    - Please pray for a good report & wisdom for any decisions that need to be made.

** Please continue to pray for all the organizations, religious & national, that are working with the Ukrainian refugees in Europe. Pray also for the millions of refugees that are heading into the unknown. **

Only by His Strength,

Sandy

Just a Little Pixie Dust

As soon as the final seconds tick down in the Super Bowl, the MVP or the quarterback of the winning team gets asked a very important question phrased something like, "Hey, you just won the Super Bowl. What are you going to do?" With a silly grin on his face, the player responds, "I'm going to Disneyland/Disney World." This tradition has been going on since 1987 and will probably continue for many, many years. In fact, this year's winner, The Los Angeles Rams had several team members in Disneyland the very next day. They rode on a float with Mickey and celebrated their hard-fought win. 

Well, my sister and I didn't ride on a float, but on February 3rd, after my 4th chemo, we flew to Orlando for a few days of sun & fun with Mickey & friends at Walt Disney World. We had lunch with a friend from high school and his wife. We had a great time catching up!!! 

However, the main purpose of our trip was to attend my uncle's memorial service near Daytona on Saturday and visit with my cousins, most of whom I had not seen in probably 10 years. It was a nice service remembering my uncle who served the Lord in several churches for his entire life adult life. Here I am with my sister and my cousins.

On Friday, my sister and I visited Disney's Animal Kingdom. We started off with breakfast at Animal Kingdom Lodge's Boma restaurant which has a large buffet of yumminess. Then it was on to Animal Kingdom. It was a very warm day and although we didn't see as much as we wanted, we enjoyed the day and seeing the animals. After walking a little over 6 miles, we had pizza at the hotel and then collapsed in our room while watching the Olympics.

Sunday's park was EPCOT. Knowing how big the park is and how much we wanted to do AND for our physical well-being, we both rented scooters to "zip" around the park. It was a cool, cloudy day, but we had fun. We had dinner at the nice Italian restaurant and stayed until after the evening show, "Harmonious" on the lake. 

It was Magic Kingdom Monday for us. After renting scooters again, we waited in line at the Main Street Bakery for these enormous Mickey cinnamon buns. They were so good!!! Once we got familiar with where everything was, we set off to do our favorite rides and attractions. But we had early dinner reservations at Beast castle!!! Squeal!!! We were seated in the "main ballroom", and it looked just like the movie. Once our order was taken, they announced that Beast had heard we arrived and would be coming out to greet us shortly and to please stay in our seats. Sure enough, Beast arrived and waved and posed for pictures. Although fairly pricey, we thought the appetizer, prime rib, sides, and dessert was worth it. After dinner, we rode our favorite rides - The Haunted Mansion, Pirates of the Caribbean, and of course, It's a Small World. At the end of the night, the new "Enchantment" show on Main Street was fabulous. We didn't have a great spot to watch, but it was a great ending to a great day!!!

Since we were flying home Tuesday night, we were going to spend our day at Hollywood Studios. Between the line for the Skyliner and the weather forecast, we did a last-minute pivot and decided to do some shopping at Disney Springs. We were sure glad we made that choice because while we were there, we put our new ponchos to good use. Then it was back to the airport for our evening flight home. We arrived at the airport so early, that we couldn't even check-in!!! After wasting some time and grabbing some food, we checked in and found our way to the gate. 

Three days after returning to the real world, I had my blood drawn to see where my numbers were for my upcoming date with Mr. Chemo. Thankfully, my CA-125 dropped to 76. Although I was anticipating a lower number, it was lower and that was a good thing!!! My platelets were good, too. So, onward to chemo #5!!! WooHoo!!! 

Thursday was my follow-up appointment where I was deemed "normal." I was shocked, but for chemo purposes my numbers were all normal and I was sent off I went to spend the next 2 days sitting in a chair while toxic chemicals race through my body to kill the evil cancer cells. As usual, I spent my time in the chair, napping, eating, and adding products to our business website.

As I write this post, Ukraine's people are fiercely defending their homeland against Russian invaders. I saw a Facebook post from Michael W. Smith, a Christian recording artist. This is part of his post:

"I’ve been around the world many times, including places like Ukraine, Latvia, Estonia… where the foul stench of communism was once thick in the air.

And the people who once lived under it could not have been happier to finally be FREE. It’s like the weather itself was different: once gray, dreary skies gave way to crystal clear blue skies and warm sun.

I’m sickened to watch helplessly as precious human lives are once again dragged into conflict they don’t want, by power-hungry tyrants who want to return to evil ideologies and oppression. And it’s happening all over the world - not just Ukraine.

People were meant for freedom. Once they taste it, they don’t want to go back. We all just want to live our lives in peace.

Praying for peace and sanity to prevail, and for the precious lives caught in the crossfire. God, have mercy."

I love that MWS spoke of being FREE. As Americans, we understand freedom. We fought the Revolutionary War over 200 years ago to declare our freedom from England. And today, we have many freedoms that other countries do not have. 

But there is another freedom that is necessary to live a full and abundant life. That freedom can only be found in Jesus Christ. Through his death on a cross, and his victory over death, we can be free from the chains that hold us to the sin & death of this world. It states quite simply in the Scriptures in Acts 16:31, "And they said, 'Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved, you and your household.'" 

I don't know about you, but as this Micah Taylor song states, I'm "Walking Free." The lyrics of the second verse are so good and so me!!! I hope you too can say that you are walking with Jesus!!!

Prayer Requests:

Friday, March 11 - Blood draw approx. 7:30am ET - Pray for lower CA-125 and good platelet numbers.

Tuesday, March 15 - Follow-up appointment 9:00am ET, followed by Chemo #6 / Day 1

Wednesday, March 16 - Chemo #6 / Day 2

Pray for The Williams family from my church who have been missionaries serving in Ukraine. They are currently safe and serving the Lord by serving the refugees who have fled. I cry & cry out to God every time I read one of their Facebook posts. Here is a part of one:

"I don’t have words to describe the depth of sorrow and confusion and hell on earth we are experiencing - living in Czech not home while half our team and church are still in UA, watching Ukraine’s beauty on fire, people are dying and it is not stopping, and the awful complexities of running a chaotic humanitarian aid group on the fly in the midst of it all.

Yet I choose to turn to Our God who sees, knows, and who included in His Word the right to wrestle with pain and worship Him at the same time. Through the pain, His presence doesn’t leave and the Bible is my true source of peace in the nightmare. I wake in the middle of the night and recite Scripture these days. Friends, I beg you to repent, believe, and turn to follow Jesus the Savior because tomorrow is NOT a guarantee! He sees what we can’t. And He is good and loving and just. I will sing of the goodness of God."

Only by His Strength,

Sandy

PS - I think this world needs some pixie dust and a whole lot of PRAYER!!! 

Platelets, Pomegranates, and Prayer

 Yes, this blog post is brought to you by the letter "P."

With the stomach bug in my rear view mirror, I began eating "normally" and enjoying every bite. In fact, I probably enjoyed it too much!!! However, I think I was able to keep a few pounds off the scale. Hooray! 

Early on Friday morning, January 14, I headed to LabCorp for my blood draw. I could tell the nice girl who walked into the cubicle was a newer employee. After verifying my information, she attempted to find the vein in my right elbow. She thought she found it, but she went to get the needle, etc. and came back she couldn't find it again. She went to do my hand, but had some trouble and called for back-up. I'm so thankful that the back-up person was able to help her get the needle where it belongs and finish my blood draw. It took a lot longer than I expected. I then drove my sister to work in Philly and then came home and had my breakfast. 

On Saturday morning, I received the results on my portal. To say that I was shocked and worried would be an understatement. My platelet count was 75!!! In order to receive chemotherapy, your platelet count needs to be over 100!!! I put out an urgent prayer request on my personal Facebook page and in my Christian ovarian cancer group. I was truly blown away with so many comments to pray for my pesky platelets. One of the girls in my cancer group commented that a nurse told her to drink pomegranate juice, milk, eat avocados, and red grapes. I also read online to eat meat, poultry, and pork, plus tomatoes, potatoes, egg yolks, cereal, leafy greens, peanuts, and a few other things. I went to the market and found pomegranate juice and bought red grapes. The juice is very tasty and I love red grapes. I also contacted the oncologist nurse and she didn't seem too concerned. She just advised that I should go to get my blood drawn again on Thursday morning before my doctor appointment and hopefully by the time my appointment would be over, we'd have the results and know if I could continue with chemo for the day. 

This guy was hanging in the cubicle with my favorite phlebotomist ... Marge. His name is Vinny.

Well….. I got ready to have my exam. In comes the nurse, a medical student who wasn’t introduced, and Courtney, a Gyn Oncology Fellow who is shadowing Dr. K. She answered all my CT scan questions and said everything on the CT scan looked good. They left for a few moments and then they all came back with the doctor. She checked me over while I provided comic relief. In fact, I was wearing my new Faithlet bracelet and Courtney asked what it was. I was happy to share that it read “I CAN DO ALL  THINGS.” I told them that this is my verse and that it ends with “THROUGH CHRIST WHO STRENGTHS ME.” During the exam, I did express that I was concerned about being short of breath quite often. Now, I know I’m horribly out of shape, but it feels different. Therefore, the doctor ordered both and EKG and an Echocardiogram. She definitely didn’t want the chemo to be successful and then me have heart problems. And considering I have a bit of a family history, I don’t want to take any chances.

At this point, the nurse had slipped out, she came back with a fabulous announcement. My platelets were …. Drum roll please ………….

235!!!!!!!!!!!

I think my jaw hit the floor. When I picked it up off the floor, I do know is that I shouted …. “PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!” I was so shocked that I had to double check the number again. She really said … 235!!!! With that everyone left the exam room and I did a little happy dance!!! I texted my sister and a couple of friends with the great news and headed up to the infusion floor. The picture below is after I was hooked up to Mr. Chemo. And by the way, my CA-125 is down to 85!!! And that's another "P" ... Praise!!!

Prayer. It’s this amazing conversation with the God of the Universe. The God who created EVERYTHING — from the smallest micro-organism that might not even be discovered yet, to each and every one of you reading this, to the baby in the womb, to the centenarian in the nursing home, to our entire universe, and to every animal, bird, reptile, and invertebrate — has a desire to have a personal relationship with you & me. He really does. So many times, we think of prayer as a last resort. A cry for help. When, in fact, He is interested in your daily life. The highs and the lows. The times when we question everything and the times we are just numb to everything. There are so many verses in Scripture that show that He cares about every detail and how we should pray. Just Google verses about prayer and you'll get over 2 million results. Some of my favorite verses on prayer are as follows, but there are so many:

Matthew 21:22 - "And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith."

Romans 12:12 - "Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer."

Philippians 4:6 - "...do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God."

James 5:13a - " Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray..."

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 - "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."

Enjoy this song from Santus Real titled "Pray." It's been out for quite a while, but it's a good reminder of how we need to pray.

Prayer Requests:

Tuesday, February 1 - EKG & Echocardiagram - approximately 2pm ET

Friday, February 11 - Blood work - 7:30am ET - Lower CA-125 & good platelet number

Monday, February 14 - Doctor appointment with my Hematology doctor - 10:20am ET

Thursday, February 17 - Follow-up appointment with APN - 9am ET followed by Chemo #5 / Day 1 (if numbers are good) - Pray for no reactions

Friday, February 18 - Chemo #5 / Day 2 - start approx. 10am - Pray for no reactions

Other notes of interest:

I entered another Proverbs 31 writing challenge. I won't know if my devotional was accepted until sometime in March. 

*** Save the Date *** -- For those of you in the Philly area, the NOCC Together in Teal Run/Walk is scheduled to be in person this year on September 10. I'm hoping to form a team to run/walk and raise money to find a cure!!! If you're interested in participating on my team, even if you live somewhere outside of the Philly area, let me know in the comments below or send me a Facebook message.

Thanks again for all your encouragement, hugs, but especially, your PRAYERS!!!!!

Only by His strength,

Sandy

Halftime

The time clock clicks down .... 3. 2. 1. 0. The players leave the field and head to the locker room to hear from their coach regarding the game so far.

Here I am again, with 3 rounds of chemo down & (hopefully) only 3 to go. 

Strike up the band. It's Chemo Halftime!!!

The weeks between round 2 & round 3 went quickly as they usually do when approaching the Christmas holiday. Bible Study finished. Our church had a Christmas party with games, cookie decorating, singing, a story for the kids, and a devotional for teens and adults. I had lunch with friends. And then it was time to pack for our trip to Georgia to see our "family" for Christmas. I had my blood drawn the morning we flew. The flight down was uneventful and I got to watch one of my favorite Christmas movies, "Elf." Our family picked us up and we went to dinner at another family member's home. It was fun seeing them and seeing how much the kids had grown, but we were all tired from a busy day, so we headed home, found our rooms, and said good night.

The next day was a beautiful, sunny day. A bit cool for Georgia standards, but a least the sun was shining AND it was Tea Party Day for four lovely ladies and one 4-year-old princess!!! We had a lovely time eating little sandwiches, scones, desserts, and drinking ourselves silly with different flavors of tea. Our little princess even danced a bit. Here are some pictures from our party:

The following day, we were just going to bum around, maybe go to a movie, but that all changed when Dad got sick. We think he picked up a 24 hour stomach bug. So between my sister and me, we took care of him throughout the day. Finally, on Christmas Eve, he started feeling better and could keep down food. We stayed home from their church and watched our home church on YouTube and had a late lunch. Later, that afternoon, I was feeling tired, so I went up to my room to take a nap. When I woke up, I really wasn't feeling great and guess what .... now I had the stomach bug. YUCK!!!! I was so thankful that my room had a private bathroom! I think I wore a path in the carpet between the bed and the bathroom. Finally, about 1 am Christmas morning, I was finally done and I crawled back in bed and slept. When I finally dragged myself out of bed and threw some sweats on, it was after noon!!! I drank some of the Pedialyte that we got for Dad, had a banana and a piece of toast. Of course, we do things as a family, so, my sister got the bug overnight. We did, however, have a very nice Christmas dinner, just without my sister.

Again, on Sunday, we watched our home church service in NJ and our hosts actually went to their church's service. The family from our first night came back over for some fun and pizza dinner. The kids had fun with a Lego train that actually went around on the track. In fact, the little boy thought it was fun to see how fast the train would go before it derailed!!! LOL!!!

Monday came too soon and it was time to repack everything and go back to the airport to fly home. Although our flight was delayed, we were so glad that Southwest was not one of the airlines that was cancelling many flights. Thank you Lord!!! We got home after waiting in the covered parking for a rainstorm to pass, getting dinner, and stopping at Wawa for milk, etc. After eating dinner, we dragged the suitcases in from the car and went to bed. Because you see, my sister had to go to work the following day and I had to see the APN & start the next round of chemo!!!

After getting my lunch & stuff ready to go, my sister drove me to MDA for my long day in the chair. After a long wait for the APN, we went over the numbers, etc. and all looked good. My CA-125 dropped from 138 to 108. Not as big a drop as the first time, but I'll take it!!! My platelets were also good, so ... off to the Infusion floor. The only extra thing is that I will need to have a CT scan before my next appointment and chemo.

With all the travel and sickness, as soon as I was hooked up, it was off to slumberland. Upon waking and having lunch, I got busy doing "stuff" and trying to occupy my time until I was disconnected and I could go home. Although, since I return the following day, they kept access to my port so it is easier the next day. I really appreciate this!!! My sister picked me up, took me home, we had dinner, and I went to bed. The next morning, a good friend took me back to MDA for day 2. I was lead to my chair and a new nurse - Janine, AND I did not have a window seat! She got me hooked up and guess what, I took another snooze. Thankfully, no problems or weird reactions, just boredom. I did however, finally address my Christmas cards to the girls in my ovarian cancer group on Facebook. As I was address the last one, the last of my treatment sounded and I texted my sister and she came and picked me up. I thank God for 2 uneventful days.

Usually, on the slug days following chemo, I have some energy, but I just had nothing. The tank was empty. Since my stomach was still not 100%, I ate bland foods and drank plenty of water to "flush out" my system. I just felt blah. Nothing I ate seemed to stay in me. I felt weaker and weaker. Finally, I contacted the nurses at MDA and explained my situation and asked if I should take Imodium. They said I could take it and to drink Pedialyte. After several doses, my body seemed to get the idea that food was good for me and I started feeling like my old self - several pounds lighter - but feeling good. 

During my slug days, I watched a LOT of college football bowl games. I got to do a LOT of thinking about my life while I drifted in and out of naps. And just like the team heads back to the locker room in the stadium, I headed to the locker room of my mind with my coach, Jesus. I don't think He made any major changes to my life plan, just a few tweaks. I still have a long way to go, but my goal is heaven and I'm following after Him. Have you had a half-time with the Savior? What would He tell you? Do you need to make some tweaks to your life - spiritual, physical, or mental? It's never too late to hit the locker room with Jesus!!!

This is the song that was playing on my Apple Music Worship Now channel when I finished writing. This kind of sums up my feelings. It's "Give Me Jesus" by UPPERROOM. Hit play, sit back and worship for a little over 8 minutes. You'll feel a LOT better!!! I promise!!!

Prayer Requests:

Wednesday, January 12 - CT Scan - 1:00pm ET - pray that there are no signs of cancer

Friday, January 14 - Blood draw - 7:30am ET - pray for lower CA125 and good platelet numbers.

Thursday, January 20 - Doctor appointment & Chemo #4 / Day 1 - pray for good report from doctor and no side effects while getting chemo - also pray for good weather

Friday, January 21 - Chemo #4 / Day 2 - pray for good day getting chemo and no side effects

Thanks for all your prayers & encouragement on this journey!!!

Only by His Strength,

Sandy

Still the Same?

They say some things never change, but on the other hand, they say change is good. 

When it comes to my body and chemo, the first round really had me worried that I now would respond differently each time. I can honestly say, I'm experiencing ... Adventures in Chemo Land!!! 

Right before my last blog post, I attended my quilt guild's fall retreat. I had a great time seeing friends and sewing/quilting for a weekend away. My sister & I also took our business stuff and vended. After getting home and carrying all the stuff back in the house, the next day, my back was sore and I had developed a "rash." I thought, that was odd, but I was carrying boxes, a sewing machine, etc., so I put some "Icy Hot" on it and hoped it would go away. By the next day, the soreness had not gone away and my sister kept saying the rash looked worse. I went to Bible Study, stopped & ordered our Thanksgiving pie (by the way ... it was yummy), came home, had lunch and continued on with my list of things to do. By Wednesday, the bumps were getting bigger and more annoying!!! Finally, on Thursday night after choir rehearsal, I asked my nurse friend to take a look at the rash. She said she wasn't sure, but it looked like .... Shingles!!! 

The next morning I was on the phone shortly after 8am to see if I could get in to see my doctor. Unfortunately, she had no available appointments, but thankfully, I was able to get an appointment with another Cooper doctor that morning!!! Of course, that was the morning I had an appointment to shave my hair off and I had to take my Dad to get both his flu shot and his COVID booster (in 2 different places). I arrived at the doctor appointment and soon was called back to an exam room. Soon the doctor came in and looked at my rash and confirmed ... yes, you have Shingles!!! And of course the rash is on the same side as my huge bruise from when I passed out in the shower. She prescribed some medicine and I asked the important question, can I get them again? And, unfortunately, I can. Gosh, that made me jump for joy!!! Not really. I stopped by the drug store later in the day and picked up my 2 new drugs.  

Of course, I had 3 different activities planned for that Saturday, all in different directions and different places. However, due to the shingles and the "pain spikes", I only attended one of those activities. I laid pretty low the rest of the weekend, took my meds, and tried to rest. I watched lots of football, napped, ate, and napped some more!!! By Tuesday morning, I was more than ready to go to Bible Study. As I was driving, I prayed and asked God to relieve the "pain spikes" so that I could enjoy Bible Study. I know it sounds trivial, but God heard my prayer. Not only did I not have any "pain spikes" during Bible Study, but I didn't have another one. None. Zero. Zip. Nada!!! Praise the Lord!!!!! And yes, when chemo is over, I'm getting a Shingles shot. 

Then on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, I went for my pre-chemo blood work. I thought my numbers would look better than after feasting on turkey, stuffing, pumpkin pie, etc. Because it's been so hard to find a vein in my elbow, I just give them my hand and that has worked out pretty good. I received the results back on the following Monday and PRAISE THE LORD ..... my CA-125 dropped from 210 to 138!!! That's 72 points lower!!! It still has a long way to go to get to "normal" or lower, but I'm on the way!!! And my platelets were higher!!! I don't know how that happened with chemo and the fall, but they were much higher. WooHoo!!!

Then I had my chemo follow-up on Tuesday morning. I got to see my Advance Practice Nurse (APN), Jacquie. We hadn't seen each other since March. During the exam, we laughed a lot, discussed movies, my numbers, etc. and spending Christmas day in pajamas. I then headed up to see Mr. Chemo and spend a long day in the chair. By the time they hook you up, give you the pre-meds, I'm ready for a nap!!! And because I've had a reaction to Carboplatin in the past, they check my vitals every hour. I'm usually one of the first people in a chair in the morning and I'm one of the last to leave in the evening. My nurses Jenn & Jalpa were great. Finally, it was time to be unhooked and go home. The one good thing is that they leave my port access in and just tape it up so I they don't have to poke me again the next day. 

My Tuesday view

Wednesday was a later start time, so one of my bff's was able to take me. I checked in and took a seat in the waiting area waiting to be called back. I watched people come, get called back, more people came, and got called back, but not me. After a while, I wondered, did they forget me? I mean, I was sitting almost in front of them!!! Finally, I asked one of the check-in girls, did you forget me??? Within a few minutes, they came to get me and they took me to a PRIVATE ROOM!!! I had requested my Tuesday nurse, Jenn, and sure enough, she was my nurse for Wednesday, too!!! She took my vitals, got me hooked up to Mr. Chemo and what did I do??? If you guessed took a nap, you'd be wrong!!! I actually ate lunch, and believe it or not, I brought a quilting project to cut out. (see pictures) I didn't get it all cut out, but I made good progress!!! Again, I was one of the last people to leave the floor. 

The days after chemo are what I fondly call "slug days." I have little to no energy to much of anything. My mind is foggy and my body just wants to stay in one place. Usually, I don't have much appetite and sometimes food doesn't taste very good either. This past time, food tasted fairly good. And since I don't do much during the day, sleeping at night is a problem. The only thing that seems to help is listening to someone read Scripture on a video on YouTube. It's a horrible cycle and only time can correct the imbalance. However, once the nasty chemicals are "flushed" from my system, it's like night and day. I still get tired easily, but at least I have energy to do things around the house and to write!!!

Over the past month or so, I have heard some incredible teaching from the Bible. I'm going to try and keep it short & sweet, but God's words are so powerful. 

I was able to jump in on Tuesday morning Bible Study. They were doing an overview of the entire Bible called "The Story of Scripture." Quite a feat in only 13 weeks! By the time I was able to attend, they were at the end of the Old Testament. The next lesson was not the start of the New Testament, but what scholars call The Intertestamental Period or The Silent Years. This was 430 years where God's people did not hear from God. But as we learned, God was still working during those years. If you studied that time period, you would be amazed at what transpired. Little did God's people know, He was still in control and preparing the world for the arrival of His Son, Jesus Christ. In all my years in church, I don't think I had ever heard such a concise and understandable lesson about this time period and the significance of it in the history of the church. It strengthened my faith to know that even when I think God is silent in my life, He is still in control. He is still working. And He still hears my prayers. 

The other Bible teaching is from my pastor, Seth McCoy. For advent, he is taking a character from the Christmas story and looking at that person with perhaps, a different perspective. The first Sunday of December, we studied Zechariah from Luke 1:5-25. I think the part of the message that got to me is to never stop praying and believing that God will answer. Zechariah & Elizabeth prayed many years for a child and had probably given up hope, but God answered when they least expected it. In fact, because Zechariah didn't believe the angel Gabriel, God silenced him until his son was born. 

Last Sunday, we looked at John the Baptist from the passage in Luke 1:39-66. John was the son that Zechariah & Elizabeth had been faithfully praying. This passage tells about the visit of Mary to her cousin, Elizabeth. Mary was newly pregnant with Jesus and Elizabeth was in her 6th month. Luke tells us in the first part of verse 41, "And when Elizabeth heard the greeting of Mary, the baby leaped in her womb." At those words, I stopped to ponder, do I "leap" for joy when I see a brother or sister in Christ? Do I "leap" for joy when I hear what God is doing in someone's life? Do I shout praises to God for what He has done? Or has this current life that I live with COVID protocols, chemotherapy, and dealing with NJ disability claim cause me to become passive with others blessings? I pray that I would rejoice always - through the good, the bad, and the ugly. I pray that you can, too!!!

So, to wrap up:

God is always in control. 
God is always listening to our prayers. 
God is always answering our prayers and sometimes it takes a while. 
God is always waiting to hear our praises in all things and in all situations. 

I recently started hearing this song from Sanctus Real on Christian radio. It's called "My God Is Still The Same." The words remind me of the Bible teaching I've heard over the past month. I pray that you will be blessed as you listen. 

From me & my family, I wish you & yours a very, Merry Christmas & a Blessed New Year!!! 

Joy to the world ... the Lord is come!!!

Prayer Requests:

December 21 - Pre-chemo blood work - pray for a lower CA-125 & good platelet number

December 28 & 29 - Follow-up exam (Tues.) and Round #3 (Tues. & Wed.)

Only by His Strength,

Sandy

And Round One goes to ...

After my last blog post, I thought I would begin chemo in early October, but God had other plans. Little did I know that my health insurance and MD Anderson (MDA) would haggle for several weeks over dollars and cents and other medical stuff that I may never know. All I do know is that I finally was scheduled for my two days of chemo on November 3 & 4. In the meantime, I received my Covid booster shot, cortisone shots in both knees, and I had more blood drawn. Unfortunately, my CA-125 went up to 210!!! YIKES!!!

Since I was filing for disability, my "last day of work for awhile" was October 29. I was blown away that my team held a "special" team meeting to say good-bye and wish me well. I was touched and moved to tears. It's times like these when you realize that family is not just the people who share the same DNA, but the people you work, worship, and walk with through life. I am truly blessed to have family in all those categories.

After two days of getting things done around the house in preparation for the "yucky" days, it was finally time to deal with Mr. Chemo again. My sister dropped me off before 8am at MDA and I headed to the infusion floor armed with things to do while sitting for 6-7 hours. Day One was the slooooow infusion of Carboplatin. The day before chemo, you take steroids to pump you up, then when you get there, they pump you full of things to relax you before the actual drug pumps through you. Up & down, up & down. Geez!!! Since I was so relaxed, I settled in, put on some music and took a nice nap!!! Next thing I knew, I was time to eat my lunch! After lunch, I watched some TV and soon, Day One was over. So much for getting something done!!! Day Two was much the same only this time, a slooooow infusion of Taxol. I was done much sooner than anticipated. As always, the nurses are super nice and friendly. 

In previous rounds of chemo, by the day after, food starts tasting blah, especially dairy products. Therefore, I eat bland foods like chicken noodle soup and jelly sandwiches. This time, food tasted okay, but I didn't really have an appetite. I just ate smaller portions because I knew I needed the nutrition. On Saturday morning, I had a big muffin and a cup of tea. I decided I felt good enough to take a shower. I got my stuff together and headed for the bathroom. I got in, shampooed my hair and started cleaning my body when all of a sudden, I felt extremely light-headed. I grabbed the handle where the soap sits and thought "dear Lord help me." The next thing I knew, I was at the bottom of the tub with the water running. After I realized what happened, I turned off the water and made sure I could move my arms and legs. Thankful that I did not hit my head!!! After maneuvering my body around so that I was on my hands and knees, I turned the water back on and finished rinsing. I slowly got up and got out of the shower. I sat on the toilet seat with my head between my knees for several minutes. When I finally felt better, I headed to my room wrapped in a towel. I laid down and asked my sister to check me for blood. Again, so thankful that I was not bleeding, but she did notice I had two large bruises - one on my side and one on my leg. So... I just took it easy for the rest of the day. And I ate more food!!!

The next few days, I made sure to eat and get plenty of rest. Thankful again for an extra hour due to the end of daylight savings. Since feeling better, I've attended Bible study, a high school play, my quilt guild's weekend retreat, and Family Missions Night. 

I started a First 5 study on Joshua a couple of days before chemo. One verse that jumped out to me was Joshua 1:9, "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” It was exactly what I need to read before starting chemo ... again. In fact, I have part of that verse on my bulletin board above my desk. It's comforting to know that whether your sitting in a chemo chair, at a desk at work, a driver's seat, a wheelchair, or a recliner, that the Lord is with you!!! Knowing that He's with me gives me strength and courage to face anything that comes my way. I pray that you have that same assurance.

I love this song by Dante Bowe called "Joyful." I makes me smile and reminds me that "This is the day that the Lord has made!" I hope it makes you smile, too!!!

May you & your family celebrate a blessed & happy Thanksgiving!!! Remember, that even though there is still so much unrest and discontent, we each have so much to be thankful for this year. Count your blessings!!!

And as a side note, Saturday, November 20 marks 8 years since the surgery that changed my life. It's been a journey, but God has been with me every step of the way and he'll continue to be with me every step of the way.

Prayer Requests:

- Blood work - Wednesday, November 24 - pray for lower CA-125

- Appointment & Chemo #2 - Tuesday, November 30 & Wednesday, December 1

- Pray for the days after chemo that I would eat enough to keep my strength and that the food will taste good!!!

Only by His Strength,

Sandy

Let's Get Ready to Rumble!

As the iconic Michael Buffer steps to the middle of the ring and holds the microphone at a boxing match or pro-wrestling match, you immediately know the first words from his mouth with be, "Let's get ready to rumble!!!" Those words have become a part of pop culture and are used frequently.

But, can you imagine .... The Israelite army shouting those words to their enemies??? In most battles, I'd like to think they relied on God more than their own strength to win each battle and secure the Promised Land for future generations. Just like we should rely on God more than our own strength and wisdom to win our battles - large or small!!!

Since my last doctor appointment and CT scan at the end of July, it was a long month of waiting and wondering what was going on in my body. I finally received word that another CT scan was approved by my health insurance and I could now schedule the scan. On Friday, September 17, I went to get the scan in the afternoon and then had to wait until Thursday, September 23 to get the results. Since they didn't call that afternoon, I figured they didn't see anything horrendously bad, but I still had this horrible feeling that I would be needing to go to the hospital to get that left pleural effusion drained.

Finally, Thursday came!!! I had my family doctor appointment in the morning. Everything was "normal" as normal can be for me!!! LOL!!! Although, she did put me on some blood pressure med because my BP tends to be a little on the high side. She renewed my other prescription and I got a flu shot. She also told me that she didn't think my pleural effusion was big enough to drain. WooHoo!!! She even showed me the CT scan of my lungs. WOW!!! Now to go home get some lunch and pray & prepare for my afternoon oncology appointment.

After waiting in the exam room, I was first "interviewed" by a medical student. He asked a LOT of questions and then listened to my heart & lungs. He couldn't even hear the pleural effusion!!! Then the doctor came in and talked to me about the CT scan, how my CA-125 went from 71 to 127, and her meeting with the tumor board. At the end it came down to ... 6 more rounds of chemo!!! She confirmed that the pleural effusion wasn't big enough to drain and the lymph nodes weren't big enough to biopsy. We are hopeful that chemo will knock these things out of me for a good long time!!! So .... I'm ready to rumble with my 4th Recurrence of this silent killer. 

Again, I'm waiting on insurance to approval my chemo treatments. Then, we can figure out a starting date with Mr. Chemo. I will also be taking disability from work during treatments

In the meantime, I would appreciate your prayers as I do battle with this cancer again.

I'll update again when I have a starting date.

This song is soooooo good. Sung in this video by the amazing CeCe Winans. It's "Never Lost." I know that someday, I may lose this battle with cancer, but HE will NEVER lose. And as Paul states in Philippians 1:21, "For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain."

Prayer Requests:

• For strength & energy to keep my body strong & healthy while getting chemo.
• That my body will tolerate a slightly different mix of chemo drugs and that I will not have any allergic reactions.
• For my family as they are again thrust into the caregiver role.
• That I would be a shining light for Jesus wherever I go.

Only by His Strength,

Sandy